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Have you ever tried to reason with with a 2 year old?

Were you surprised with their negotiation skills?

Well, my son is now almost 2 and half years old and has now discovered that he has a will - a seriously strong will at that. Typical of children his age, he is far more concerned with getting what he wants than with executing his mother or father's instructions.

It seems to me that as children we tend to be assertive rather than accommodating in our communication with others. We are only interested in satisfying our own needs and desires rather than satisfying the needs and desires of those around us.

It is only as we grow older that we believe the world does not in fact revolve around us and that we have to fit into our environment in a responsible and positive way. We learn that we can not only do as we wish but also have to consider the rights, feelings and desires of others.

This made me think about the 5 basic negotiation approaches and how you can use them to support the achievement of your sales negotiation targets.

1.Competitive negotiation

This is a way of negotiation that is primarily assertive and concerned only with your own needs, wants and targets.

2.Accommodating negotiation

This is a way of negotiation that is primarily focused on the needs, wants and objectives of your counterparts whilst ignoring your own needs. Sales training programmes often support this negotiation approach as the most appropriate strategy.

3.Compromising negotiation

Probably the most famous of all negotiation strategies. This is a way of negotiation where you meet your counterpart in the middle. You get some of your needs, wants and targets met and you do the same for your counterparts.

4.Collaborative negotiation

This is a style of negotiation where you seek to satisfy all of the needs, wants and targets of your counterparts and they reciprocate.

5.Avoiding negotiation

This is a style of interaction where you do not regard negotiation as the best method to achieve your objectives.

The key factors which will determine which of the above approaches should be in your negotiations is to answer the following three questions:

a.How important is an ongoing relationship to you?

If the relationship is important, then you will not be able to be only competitive, you will have to at least compromise with your counterpart. If you do not meet the requirements of your counterparts, then it is not likely that a meaningful relationship will develop.

b.How many alternatives are available to you?

If you have a host of alternatives available, you can afford to be more competitive. Conversely, if you have no alternatives, then you will be forced to be more accommodating.

c.How much time do you have available?

If you have time on your side, then you can certainly be more competitive. The less time available to you, the more accommodating you will have to be.

As you can see, it is important to ask yourself these three questions before you start negotiating so that you can pick the strategy most suited to the situation at hand rather than just pursuing a negotiation strategy solely based on your preference.

It is also important to remember that you should be flexible in your approach. You may want to change your approach as new information becomes available during your negotiations.